I hate her

I keep making mistakes.

I can do nothing right.

I’ll lose everyone I love

Because when it is comes down to it I’m alone at night.

I sleep and sleep because I know that’s where I’m safe.

In the morning it won’t matter what I said or did.

That’s where I’m okay. I’m safe amid my sheets.

I just have to sleep.

I keep digging and digging my hole and the walls are now too steep.

I can’t climb out.

I’m surrounding myself with all my insecurities. My doubts.

Please tell me this isn’t me.

That this is a phase I’ll get over it.

Prove it to me. Let me see.

This cannot be me.

It can’t.

I hate this girl.

She’s selfish.

She’s impassionate.

She’s unkind.

Who is she?

Tell me she is not me.